I have too many thoughts running through my head right now to sufficiently put them into words. But, since "radical insufficiency" (as my beloved roommate is fond of saying) has never stopped me from expressing myself before, I blog.
In adoration tonight as I was flipping through the Gospels looking for something specific I found something that I wasn't looking for at all, but that I highly suspect was looking for me. My prayer was somewhat in desperation, trying to make sense of some thoughts and feelings I've been having the past few days. I'm not very good at taking up residence in that threshold between confusion and clarity. I usually try to force my way into clarity and end up, eventually, in chaos. So (being Lent and all) I'm trying to just let myself be in the discomfort and see what God makes of it. Feeling very weighted down by this dis-order in my heart, my fingers fumbled upon a page in Mark's Gospel where I had one little sentence underlined.
"Little girl, I say to you arise."
All at once I felt both the authority and the immense love directed at me in that statement. Jesus wasn't throwing me a pity party and he surely wasn't playing into my fears and trepidation by letting me believe things are so bad. He was commanding me, now, to get up. "Talithacumi! and immediately the girl got up and walked" (Mk 5:41) For some reason the fact that Mark puts the Aramaic word here was especially important. I could actually hear Jesus' forming this word in his mouth. "Talithacumi"was an actual word he said in his lifetime. And, he didn't say "you" get up or even just "arise", he said 'little girl'.
I'm rambling I know but it's only because I haven't quite figured out where I should be arising to. Also, it's 12:15 and it's time for me to sleep so that I can 'arise' in the morning. Hah! I crack myself up. Sorry for the random post one faithful reader. I promise more substance tomorrow.
I hear ya Boo, I love little verses like that (they make historical-critical method-people cringe). Did you notice the next sentence? "The girl arose immediately and walked around"... You ARE doing some traveling in the near future...
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorites is a similar one:
"Young man, I tell you, arise!" (Lk 7:14-15)
Our papa elaborates here:
http://www.disf.org/en/documentation/12-871118_Miracles.asp
first off, how do you know you have "one faithful reader?" i think you have at least two :)
ReplyDeletei just wanted to say i love how the Word can be so specific, especially in the midst of our state of pre-confusion/near clarity? if you felt it in your soul, it was meant for you.
the one Scripture verse that has gone through my mind (and it is along the same lines as yours) is "Do you want to be well? Pick up your mat and walk." That makes us more than a little bit responsible for our healing, doesn't it?
even in those places where we are unsure of where we need healing :)
Thanks Matt, Thanks Penni, Yeah, although I know we can't understand scripture out of its context I also think that sometimes my heart is its context. In any case, He speaks....
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